


Letters to Anakin

by tigerchild



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Letters, M/M, Prequel, Prequels
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-11
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2019-10-08 06:31:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 1,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17381414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tigerchild/pseuds/tigerchild
Summary: Obi-wan's only way of coping after Mustafar is to write Anakin a letter everyday.





	1. Chapter 1

Anakin

I refuse to call you by the other name. it isn't you. You know this as well. Come back. We can fix this. We can fix everything.

I miss the way we were before, before must afar, before palpatine, before this massive shithole that we are in right now.

You've ruined everything. You've ruined us. I don't even think I ever will send this to you. You don't deserve it. You don't deserve anything from me, or anyone for that matter.

Obi


	2. Chapter 2

Anakin,

I've decided to send these, after all. I don't expect a reply. It would be best if you didn't, honestly.

It would be better to go without your justifications for what you have done, for who you have killed.

I know you've been looking for me, but you could and would never kill me.

Would you?

Obi-wan


	3. Chapter 3

Anakin

I miss you. I wish you'd just stop. Put an end to this game you're playing. The pain and death isn't worth it all, you know that. You must have some sense of moral code left in you. Stop killing innocents, I beg of you.

I wish you were back, and that everything was normal. We could have taken him together, you know? You and I, against the world, just like it used to be. I miss the kisses I would steal when no one else was around, or how sometimes we'd visit Naboo just to watch the beautiful pink sunsets, hidden from sight by the tall trees. The pink color of the sky would match the color of your cheeks whenever our hand would graze in public. Mine always wanting to grasp yours and not worry what anyone would think or say.

I still love you Anakin, and I'm afraid-desperately afraid-that I always will.

Obi-wan


	4. Chapter 4

Anakin

In the back of my mind each time I've written, I pray for a reply. Even now I hope for your justification of what you are doing.  
Tell me there is a better reason than Padme for all of this. Tell me you did this to end the sith once and for all. You couldn't even entrust me with this plan of yours-that's how good it was. Or, like many times before, were afraid I wouldn't allow it.  
Tell me anything, other than that you are doing it because the dark side calls you. Please.  
You can still redeem yourself, at least in my eyes. Come back.

Obi-wan


	5. Chapter 5

Anakin

Oh god, I miss you.

Each night I think of how lonely I am without you by my side. Entangled in each other each night. Waking up in the middle of the night to find you have rolled yourself off of the bed, and having to pick you up and put you back. Gently of course.  
Walking with you step-in-step wherever we went. It was simply natural. We moved through life the same, you and I. We saw the world the same way. At least, that's what I used to think.  
I don't know why I'm still writing. Perhaps all of the memories will bring you back to me somehow in the end. There's always a possibility of you tracing these back to me, but I guess the risk of loosing my life to you doesn't scare me as much anymore. Please, respond, contact me, anything.

Obi-wan


	6. Chapter 6

Anakin

I got drunk last night. I was almost tempted to turn myself in, just for the chance to see you. Of course, this was an idiotic thing to do, but what can I say. You know my heart makes decisions, not my mind, when alcohol is involved. I was drunk on liquor, sure. but also on you words, your lips, and the way you would look in my eyes. 

The way you would look my way whenever you found something amusing, or when you were about to do something you know you shouldn't. You would grin with a certain sparkle in your eye, and crinkles would form at the corner of your eyes. Your eyes. Damn. Your god damn eyes.

What happened to that person I used to know Anakin? The carefree, humorous, charming, and happy man I learned to love? Do you ever laugh anymore? Or have the sith turned your heart cold already? I want you back, but I want the old you back, not this new, cold, and barbaric you, who seeks joy in killing others and taking over everything we've ever known.

If there is any good in you left, don't let the sith kill it. Please. I'll always wait for you, you can always come back to me, no matter how broken you are. 

 

Obi-wan


	7. 7

Anakin,  
It's getting bad. I know you're to blame, but it's still so hard for me to believe this could be your doing.

I've been lonelier than ever, and haven't had contact with any living creature in weeks. Obviously I won't tell you where I am, for fear of you tracking me down. I fear you, Anakin. I'm still not used to the thought. The only times I would fear you in the past were when we would be practicing dueling. It was a fear of being humiliated mostly, a fear of being defeated by my own padawan. You were so talented. So gifted. If only you would have put those gifts to good use.

There'll be no more padawans. You have wiped out nearly every jedi in existence. I hope you're proud. You've put an end to the people that took you in, and you've nearly put an end to me.   
Somehow, the hope still remains that you'll come back. Come back to me. Come back to everything we have built together over the years. Explain, perhaps, that none of this has been your doing. You've given no demands to kill. However, I know this is likely far from the truth. Do you ever feel guilt? Have these letters become a nuisance to you? Do you read them? Did you even read the first one?

 

-Obi


	8. Chapter 8

Anakin,

Was it my fault? Did I push you down this path? I always thought I had done a decent job of allowing you to do what you chose. I turned a blind eye to you and Padme and never once turned you into the council over your various mishaps.

It pains me to think that I might have played a part in this. Was I not kind enough? Wise enough? Was I not experienced enough to be your master? Would this still have happened if Qui-Gon had trained you, instead of myself?

I could tell you were struggling towards the end. I should have intervened, instead of leaving you to figure things out for yourself. If I had been with you, I know you would not have done any of things you did that night.

 

I'm sorry I failed you.

 

Obi


End file.
